A midlife crisis is considered a state in one’s life that throws up apathy and lack of direction.
It’s a phase that deeply questions one’s existence. It is estimated to occur between 35-55 years old. It’s a period in one’s life that needs careful attention and management, failure of which could lead to unpleasant consequences. Many have been known to stray away from God at this time.
At the point of a midlife crisis, I believe that one should double down on increasing one’s faith, especially as Christians. This action is easier said than done, I know, but it is worth noting this suggestion. To be fore-knowledge is to be fore-warned.
Signs of midlife crisis include general dissatisfaction with life, emotional roller coaster and low motivation to carry on with everyday chores. Others are irritability, acting on impulse, quick temper and lack of energy or drive to do things traditionally enjoyed. In some cases, there is excessive attention paid to physical appearance.
It slips into the subconscious and sometimes those in the situation do not realize it. It’s important to catch it at the onset. When it rears its head, there are three things to remember that can help navigate the episode. These are in no way substitutes for seeking professional help.
Remember to return to the source.
By source, I mean the Almighty God, who created you perfect for a reason. God is the foundation of our being and when things go awry, as they always will, we should return to the One who formed us and said,
“I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.” Jeremiah 29:11.
This step is more manageable with believers but for unbelievers, it’s useful to seek salvation so that you can receive the benefits of this vital step.
The Holy Spirit will undoubtedly help those who genuinely seek solutions. There is nothing more gratifying and soothing than the opportunity to lay your problems at the feet of the Lord and waiting on Him in faith.
Remember the saying that “no man is an island.”
We are wired to be interdependent. Do not keep the feelings to yourself. Share them with loved ones and those you can trust. Several people have gone through this and made it out better and stronger. There are many resources out there that they can bring to your knowledge.
In most cases, the love and understanding of family members and those you trust help reduce the associated stress and confusion. While it is good to share the despair, be mindful that everyone tends to be an expert in situations like this. Guard your heart and be careful who you seek advice from.
Remember to stay away from superficial or temporary solutions.
Substance abuse, alcohol, indiscriminate sexual activities, hanging out with the wrong company, spending money without caution, etc. tend to bring momentary pleasure or comfort. They appear to be low-hanging solutions but they are, in fact, more damaging and fizzle out in no time.
A midlife crisis tends to be a phase. Meaning, it has a life span, depending on how it is managed. Be of good courage, knowing that there will be sunshine after the rain. Remember that the weeping may endure for one night but joy comes in the morning.
The first step is critical because all other healing measures will be teleguided through your obedience to the Holy Spirit. Midlife crisis is not a death sentence; neither is a condemnation to eternal grief. It is a byproduct of the world we live in. Virtually everyone is subject to the vagaries – the result of everyday living, the decisions we take and the social lives we lead.
They produce outcomes – some good, some bad. So, it’s not all doom and gloom. On the bright side, it throws up a lot of things you’ve always wanted to do, the kind of person you want to be and thus presents an opportunity to reshape your life – according to God’s will, of course.
In other words, consider making a move to turn the “lemon into lemonade.” Do not, however, act on impulse. Be at peace, knowing this is what God would have you be. Remember, you are not alone. God, whose peace passes all understanding is with you.